This is one of my favorite pictures snapped of our last trip to Hatteras Island. It's what I think of every time I picture myself back there. Time seems to stop for 7 days every summer on the Outer Banks, and we're blessed to spend those 168 hours. Yes, we're blessed.

So, we'll be there a week from today in our rented home for the week, traipsing back and forth from our door to the beach whenever we want. In the daylight. Last year Curt and I took a stroll at dusk, and found ourselves walking the Atlantic in the dark, completely unsure of which steps over the dunes were ours. Oh, exhilarating, yes, but slightly unnerving, too. They don't put streetlights on the beach, ya know. On account of the turtles and all. I love turtles.



Camden wiped out so many times riding the waves last year that he would up with swimmer's ear and a trip to the island doc. Sounds like a voodoo kinda thing, but they did take our insurance and extract a nasty bit of wax from his ear canal before loading it with antibiotic drops. He had to spend a majority of the week out of the water. It killed me as much as him, I do believe.

Don't you just love our set-up here? This is what we do when we don't traipse to the beach near the house. This is four-wheelin' it, people. We load up the truck, drive to the Point, and make our shelter like everybody else there. We've perfected our beach layout over the years since Jack and Lois introduced us to this amazing paradise. Cheers to Jack and Lois.


So, in a week, we get to pass this marvel of architecture every time we hit the Highway 12. We look for this, that's how lame we are being Connecticutians and all. It's actually one of a very few Futuro houses left in the US. Yes, we're proud to have passed it on Highway 12.


I sure do hope Camden can splash in the surf this year. Ride the waves. Dive for conch shells. Did you know that a couple of years ago, the conch shells were there for the taking? I could feel them with my feet in the 4-5-foot ocean, then Camden would dive to retrieve. He's always been a good retriever.

Which reminds me, if we ever get another Lab mutt dog, we're gonna name it OB. Short for Outer Banks. Jack and Lois always loved our Lab, Ellie.



RIP Ellie, Eleanor of the Sea.

Not only did Camden and I get our eyes dilated to the size of Jupiter's moons, but he also got glasses today! They're a gorgeous blue wire that matches his amazing, piercing eyes. Here he is with his pupils fixed and not dilated. Isn't he just the handsomest thing? Well, of course, I'm not talking about the hair. The hair is hopeless. But I still love him.



It's been such a lovely day here, almost fall-like with low humidity (and still, that hair???). I almost went to school this morning to give an entrance test to a new first grader, but she was a no-show. The boys were delighted. Truthfully, it was nice to stay home.



So, we were driving back from the eye doctor, all wide-eyed and dilated, when the sun visor fell off my van! Just fell plumb into my lap, I tell you! Shocking! Of course it happened on this drive when my pupils allowed the maximum UV rays into my eyeballs and my dingdang sunglasses weren't shady enough. I made it home, said a prayer, and disappeared into my darkened room to recover. Naturally, I fell asleep. I had dreams. Dreams of Jupiter.

We're in the midst of a home fellowship with some other folks from our church (called "small groups" in some circles) on Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University. We're learning how to "live like no one else so that later we can live like no one else." And basically, it's working. (Yeah, we did this when we lived near Pittsburgh at our church there, and we loved it then. Curt is leading this group now, so we like to think we're graduates. Our budget says otherwise.)

The idea is to budget, drop debt, save, and then be able to spend and give. This is great on paper. It works beautifully. A little harder when Target is your nearest neighbor. Nevertheless, we're pressing on. One thing I've learned is that if I spend cash only, I spend less. Significantly less. It hurts to pay with cash. I didn't realize how much I loved my little green friends, horded them in my wallet, all organized smallest to largest which isn't very large and front-to-back the way greenbacks should be. I don't want to part with these guys. And did you ever notice how they're all guys?



So, we're on budget lockdown here at Casa de Emmalemmalimabean.

obligatory picture of Emmalemmalimebean

Which means I am very choosey about what I can buy for my 2nd grade classroom.

Drat.

I love to buy stuff for my 2nd grade classroom. I really can only afford the 1-cent deals from Staples, but I have to pay $3.94 a gallon for gas to drive to the nearest store to get them, so they're not really such a big deal now, huh?

$3.94 - $.01

Not even extreme couponing can touch this. Of course, however, I have to drive to the same town where Staples is located to pick up Camden's glasses - yes, he's blind as a bat like the rest of us here at Casa de Emma-who-has-cataracts-lemmalimabean - tomorrow. So perhaps the cost differential isn't so bad. You didn't know I knew such terms, huh?



Finally, because this book was a freebie, borrowed from a friend who has a house at a beach, a real live beach that is here in tax-rich Connecticut, complete with sunshiney rocky shores and a splendid view of a nuclear power plant off-shore, I am convinced I am a Southern Lady and I must practice my Southern charms. So I deferred to this sequel to Margaret Mitchell's original GWTW. I am deep into it. I am breathing the South. I am living the life, hearing the words, feeling the humidity, seeing the Spanish moss drape over trees that have never known such beauty. I am wishing Rhett and Scarlett would just give up their stubbornness and be happy already!

I am not ready to fight the Civil War again, however. Scarlett herself is tired of the war. I am, too. Having grown up with a Rebel flag in the back seat of a good portion of my high school senior class, not that I was in the back seat of said portion, I can see that the South as it was will never be again. I for one will not miss hoop skirts and chaperones to Target. I, however, could use a carriage to take me to the bank so that I can exchange my gold for cash to buy something nice for myself.

See these monkeys? They totally got married on our field trip to the zoo before summer vacation. This reminds me of a story. Remember when my 2nd graders were trapped indoors for recess over a long New England winter?

After a long New England winter of indoor recess, a few of my kids began to play this make-believe soap opera (for lack of a better term). There was a husband, a wife, and a slew of naughty children. There was also a wizard. He struck one of the children with his magic wand and turned her into a cat. The next day, as I was working at my desk, the soap opera continued around me. I heard strange noises that sounded like a sick, deranged animal. Turns out, the cat child was having kittens in the corner. From that day on, the naughty children were kittens and the husband/wife team took them for walks using the chain links from the math tubs.


Benjy was not a kitten nor a cat. He was not even the wizard. He was just Benjy. May he always just be Benjy. And plus also, too, how will I teach without him next year? I had to promote him to 3rd grade. He's smart and all that. But, what about ME??????????

Here's my latest obsession. I. Must. Get. Myself. An. Alpaca.

I leave you with this. Proof that inanimate objects can breed.

We have friends. Real couple friends. As in they are a couple, and we are a couple. They have two boys. We have two boys. We're friends. We are BFFs and all that.

The BFFs have a house in Vermont. They've been building it gradually. It's a lovely home that resembles a farm house. One day it will have a toilet and running water and a real refrigerator. For now it has a pond with a huge splashy fountain. It has a fort for the boys and adirondack chairs for the adults. It also has a bunch of land and access to some amazing trails to take the ATVs on. No, we don't have ATVs. The BFFs have ATVs. We mooch off the BFFs. We also have our camper set up on their land. Not only are we moochers. We're squatters.

We took Viv the camper up to the property Memorial Day weekend. We also took Emma. The Lima Bean may be deaf. She may see the world through cloudy eyes. She may be 15 or 15-and-a-half or 16. But she's most def beautiful.

pet me. luv me. feed me soft food cuz my teef don't feel too gud anymore.

So this pond is quite the habitat. I personally can account for 534,113 mosquitoes. It also offers a delectable assortment of tadpoles and frogs, ants the size of my nose, and hovering bug flies that could be mammals for all I know.

We did not bring pet this home (the green one).
On account of the deaths of Fin and Rowley (the Shad Derby goldfish).
RIP Fin and Rowley.



See that raft? It had one hole in it by the time we left, a tiny hole to be true, so it was still pond-worthy. It's hard to tell how it happened. What with four boys between 7 and 11 doing pile drives and half-Nelsons and stone cold stunners. Yes, I know my WWE moves.

pet me. luv me. feed me and my friend chips and cookies with chocolate stwipes.

See that machine with four wheels? It's an ATV. Otherwise called a quad. It's loud. These are not allowed to run till 9 a.m. We woke up to the quad alarm in Vermont. Polywog Benjy learned to drive this one by himself on this trip.

The Wimpy Kid graduated to the big quad. Not that he gets to keep it. Though he told me, "I could ride that quad All. Day. Long." He didn't tip it once. This time.


We love our new BFFs and can't wait to go back to their quad farm. Of course, the camper's there, so we sort of kind of have to. Still. We can't wait.

Dave Ramsey is not happy with me. Curt probably isn't either, but he's withholding comment currently.

It's not that I went into debt to purchase my latest round of texts. I didn't charge it. I didn't take out a loan or mortgage my house for it. I didn't sell either of my children. It's just that it wasn't in the budget. And yet....

Here's what I'm reading, excepting Water for Elephants, which is on my night side table right now waiting for me. And it's a good one, too. I've not seen the movie, and probably will wait for Netflix to get it before bothering. The depression-era circus setting is fascinating. And the 90- year old. Or 93-year old. And then there's the elephant herself.

I picked up Cutting for Stone on the recommendation of my dental assistant, whom I positively adore. Every time I go for a cleaning, she fills my head with visions of novels I MUST read. The Help and House Rules came through her. Our's pretty much is a one-sided book club since my mouth is pried open and all the utterances I want to voice are trapped in the back of my throat. Do you suppose dental assistants have to take a special class on carrying on conversations when their partner can't talk? Talking For Two 101?

Mo Willems' latest is a no-brainer for anyone who knows my delightful taste in children's literature. Amanda & Her Alligator is a new one for Mo. I can't wait to read it to my class tomorrow. His blog says he'll be back in Northampton, Mass. soon. I'll be there. In case you want to stalk me or anything.

Southern Living's June issue. June. Summertime. Front porches with porch ceilings painted haint blue.

Pioneer Woman herself is the author of Charlie the Ranch Dog. I love Pioneer Woman. I love Charlie. I love PDub's cookbook, too. So, of course, I HAD to have this book. The art is just gorgeous and fun. And Charlie, oh, be still my heart. Charlie and your ears.

I went to a workshop by Sharon Taberski back in my wild Pennsylvania days. She's a solid thinker and educator on early literacy. Her blog keeps me inspired. So when I saw her latest book, Comprehension From the Ground Up, I knew it was a must read for this second grade teacher who loves reading and writing more than anything she teaches. She also detests writing in the third person.

Beth Moore's book is a freebie. Did you hear that, Dave? It was FREE! We're doing a Bible study on the fruits of the spirit using this book. If you don't know the fruits of the spirit, then you really need to listen to this song.



Sadly, I've lived 42 years without ever having done a Beth Moore Bible study. I know I'll want more when we finish this because her writing is filled with the Holy Spirit, with Bible knowledge and nuances I've never considered, with love and blessing and grace.

The remaining publications are magazines I just love. I subscribe to Country Living and Martha Stewart's Living. I picked up This Old House at Stop & Shop because I love old houses and one day, God-willing, I will live in an ancient creaking old house again with a porch ceiling painted haint blue.

What are you reading now?

So Ken and I are at Aldi's, cause he's all about saving money. I was wearing this very frock! And I'm telling him about the time when my country camper got stuck in the shag carpet,



and this girl named Skipper was eavesdropping. Spying on MY convo! All's I'm sayin' is she was all up in my Kool-Aid, tryin' to learn my flavor!

Well, Hollywood Barbie, what, pray tell, is your flavor?

You're not gonna believe this, Sparkle Barbie, but it's Pine-a Colada.

Umm, Hollywood Barbie, this is awkward, but you're my best friend, the closest thing to my DNA going on. I must tell you, I think you mean pina colada. And getting lost in the rain.

Sure, I'll have one.



I am not into health food myself, Hollywood, but my Kool Aid is Great Bluedini.

I don't mind who knows. Tell Skipper for all I care. Heck, tell P.J. and Francie and Suntan Tuesday Taylor! But I have half a brain. So I ride around on this blue elephant just to prove I am into champagne.

Good for you, Sparkles.

We're home from a whirlwind trip to Virginia. It was beyond good to be home. The mountains were so green with new leafiness and dotted with blossoms of redbud and dogwood. The air was a-swirling with pollens that coated the camera lens as soon as we uncovered it. Camden and I were sneezing and teary-eyed, but it was worth it. It was all worth it.

We rode Amtrak from right here in Windsor to Lynchburg, Va. Our train boarded at 7:30 a.m. and arrived an hour later in New Haven where we sat for a couple of hours before the Northeast Regional departed. It was so crowded in New Haven that we couldn't even sit together till a swarm of spring-breakers departed in New York City. That's when we found some seats together and remained till 8:30 when Curt's sister picked us up and drove us an hour west to Roanoke. Just being in Lynchburg was good enough. Being in Roanoke, our home for 13 years, was the best.

Mill Mountain Zoo was near the top of our list of places to go. I remember a lot of prairie dogs the last time I was there. This time, we saw two. Perhaps the rest were sleeping.

This is a lynx. He growled and snarled and hissed every time Camden and Benjy talked to him. I don't blame him. I sometimes do the same.

This is a statue that we believe is a tribute to Ruby the Siberian tiger who passed away five years ago. Ruby was a star attraction to the little zoo in the Star City. We missed her on this day. The only signage for this statue says it's for children only and names the people whose contribution made it possible. I remember the children only part. That's all.


These mountains practically hug you! Their embrace tells me I'm home. I'm safe. I'm where I belong. We're praying that God will lead us back here. Until then, we will embrace all God has for us here in New England.

This shot was taken from behind the flowers on Dad's grave looking toward Mom sitting by Michelle's. I will never understand why both my sister and father died within 18 months of each other. But I live in peace knowing that God has it all in his mighty hands. I will see each of them again because they were His. Of this, I am sure.

Here is sweet Benjy putting a sprig of dogwood on his grandaddy's grave.
Right after this, he ran and ran and ran throughout the cemetery. Who can blame him? I used to play tag in cemeteries after dark with tombstones. Not the smartest thing I ever did.

Did I say how beautiful the dogwoods were? Bloom after bloom after bloom.

No matter what I said, I couldn't sync these boys in smile mode.
And the boys' hair moans of bed-head.
And too, Benjy has toothpaste all over his shirt.

And here we are, going home. Home to Connecticut. Even though Roanoke will always be home.

Things I'm still wondering about on Friday, April 15, 2011:

1: Isn't it funny how when you write the year 2011 on the board, that 2nd graders are amazed, absolutely overcome, by the fact that Jesus was born around that long ago? That's just too cool for words.

2: How can a week last for two weeks?

3: If exercise is so ding-dang good for you, why does it leave you feeling so plumb worn out?

4: What's the deal with snow cones? You could drink sugar-water and be happy.

5: When will my Bessie, the Big Blue Van, be fixed? She's in the shop for a recall. We have a rental that I love. I'm happy with the rental. Not that I don't love Bessie.

6:Will Deangelo be the new boss on The Office or not?

7: Is there an electric outlet on Amtrak? 'Cause I have to recharge my MacBook.

8: Will Emma pee on the carpet while we're gone? Probably not if we barricade her from the upstairs. Which we will.

9: Emma will not pee on the upstairs carpet if I block access to it. So, I will keep her from being upstairs.

10: Is the moon waxing or waning?

Things I'm wondering about:

Does God burp? (courtesy of my 2nd grade class) If he does, I'm quite sure he always says, "Excuse me." And people always do.




When will Connecticut be warm? And when it's warm, will it be past my 80 degree heat threshold? And if it is, will I complain?





Why do kids have to learn how to write in cursive? I won't accept any plausible answers.





Is it possible to eat chicken three nights in a row? We'll find out tomorrow.





If you can't sing well on earth, can you sing well in heaven?





Will the new book I'm reading, Jodi Picoult's House Rules, be less depressing than all her other books I've read?





Will I be able to recharge my laptop on the train to Virginia?






Will Benjy miss me next year when he's in 3rd grade?





Will I miss Benjy?! (kidding - it's been the most amazing blessing to teach my son this year.)





What was my sister thinking the day she died? Did she know how very much I love her? How very much I respect her? In spite of my jokes and snarkiness??? Did she have any idea how much we all love her?





When will Girl Scout cookies be fat-free and low calorie and still taste the same?





What are you wondering about today?

Mom has a memory of Daddy puttering in the back yard. He was planting tulip bulbs in the small stretch of space between the old railroad cross-ties that served as a retaining wall for as long as I can remember. She remembers him pushing them into the soft dirt, making over them like they were his babies. Skinny, blue jeaned Daddy, leaning over the earth, planting a promise.

And then he got sick again. The doctors sliced into his throat and stole his cancer infected larynx, leaving him mute with helplessness. Then they fired doses of radiation into his neck and injected poison into his veins to kill the cancer cells swimming free. They tried. They tried so hard to save him. But a year without Michelle and a voice that wouldn't be heard left him with little left to live for. He slipped away, even as we prayed for him to stay.

Daddy found his voice again in the fall. He found his voice, blood fresh with life, and healthy cells moving to the drumbeat of God. He found himself in heaven, and we found ourselves crying on earth, longing to hear his country words of reason and a pathetic joke or two. The winter was long. It was cold. It was snowy and without a light we'd come to depend on. After a winter of dusk, spring crawled in.

The earth tilted more pleasing to the sun. Grass greened. The Bradford pear and dogwood blossomed fresh and white. Something green and new uncurled between the cross-ties. Without warning, pink tulips spoke. Look at me. Look at us.

Mom glanced out the window. She heard the sound. The voices of tulips whispering in the wind. Look at us. We were planted by the loving hand of a man in love with God. We were born of the earth, nurtured beneath the frozen white. We were breathed on by the hope of tomorrow and the promise of today. We are a gift from the man with the weary hands. His voice, fragrance pink and beauty full, wants you to know. He loves you. He loves you. He loves you.

You probably know that if I could vote for Stephen Colbert for president, I would. What I'd give for a State of the Union address by Colbert. I'd stay up to watch that. Yessiree, I would. Applause and all.

One of the things I love about Colbert is the On Notice board.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
On Notice - How the On Notice Board Is Made
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

And I figure if he can rant about about what's dead to him, then I can, too. Of course, I don't intend to run for president. And it is my solemn disclaimer that any On Notices I post will not detract in any way from a Stephen Colbert candidacy.

ON NOTICE for me this month are:

snow: There are still patches of it around my house. And the Connecticut River is set to flood with all the snow melt arriving from the north. I was completely enthralled with it during the winter, but now it's spring. As of today. And they're calling for snow tomorrow.

time changes: That whole thing last weekend nearly killed me. First I spent all Sunday on the wrong time. I even ventured to Aldi's and walked toward the entrance and away four times waiting for the doors to open for me. They remained closed. I thought perhaps I was on Candid Camera. I was not. Turns out, it was 6 p.m. and I had 5 on my watch.

cancer: My dad's birthday was on March 5, but those stopped in 2009. Cancer may not be gone, but it's on notice.

Sarah Palin: I know many of you adore her. She is certainly perky and lives in beautiful Alaska, not a stone's throw from Russia. She's quite lovely as carbon goes. But frankly, she annoys me. I can't get past the feeling that she's a fake. I would like to see her pop up on The X-Files one day.

plastic flowers: You can't fake nature. We used to have these neighbors two doors down. Harry and Betty. They were a funny couple. Plastic flowers dotted the front yard. Harry swore that aliens landed in the back yard, so he'd stake it out on days when his neighbor Allie was sunbathing. To this day, that's what I think of when I spy plastic flowers.

rhinitis acuta catarrhalis: Camden has a cold. Benjy seemed to be the first to get it. But Camden came home from a weekend trip to Vermont with it all sneezing and coughing and dripping out of him today. Bad cold.

censorship: I just hate it when somebody decides my children shouldn't read a book and takes it upon himself to ban it. I can decide for myself what is appropriate for my kids. Long live Harry Potter!

I nearly put Charlie Sheen on my On Notice list. But he's such a has-been, that it just seems redundant.

Gratitudes:

171: fat-free Pringles taste just as good as the real thing

172: holding Benjy's hand as we walked to Kohl's and back, to Target and back, to the house and back, to Evan's and back to his bed. I kissed my baby goodnight and tiptoed to my room.

173: miracles ~ an 80-year-old woman and her grandson rescued after 9 days turmoil in Japan

174: Emma, licking the sofa, beside me.

175: freedom to live in America where I can blog as I please, worship God as I do, live as He calls me

176: grace

177: shamrocks opening to the sun

178: shoes sans socks

179: lesson plans done just in the nick of tiime

180: family together, safe and sound

I'm seeing green up here. I knew that if I ventured out to Stop and Shop, my local grocer, I'd find some form of shamrocks. These aren't the real deal, but they're what I wanted. Aren't they beautiful?










And this beauty is a book from a thrift shop I picked up today simply because I love the color. And the texture. I paid $2.99 for GREEN and CLOTH. And it was worth it.











I bought this book because it had a pretty cover and the lovely golden award medal screamed "BUY ME!!!!!!!" That's a no-brainer, I tell you.















Mr. Richert found this doll for a mere $8. We'd have dropped 10 times that if we'd bought it new. I swear, I was leary. But by the time he'd scrubbed it clean, I was satisfied that the heat would kill any unwanted germs.










My friend Laurie gave me a gorgeous plant just like this years and years ago. I've long-since killed it. :( Finding these today just puts me in the mood for spring.

Lots to do this weekend,
not the least of which
is laundry.

















Gratitudes:

161: Overheard in second grade today:

"When I get to heaven, if people don't know how to play football, I'm gonna teach them."

162: Bible study tonight focused on Bob Barnes' book Who's In Charge Here? We loved hearing from other parents who are right there with us trying to be the parents God has called us to be.

163: Devotions this morning at school reminded me of God's calling to demonstrate love to my family and friends. I'm thankful for the reminder to do more, to do better, to reach out and show my love.

164: I talked to my BFF Jodie last night. Her sweet voice will lift me up no matter what.

165: I've lost five pounds in the past couple of weeks. My jeans feel much better.

166: Today Camden popped into my classroom to tell me something. Then he paused, thought for a second, hugged me, and disappeared. I love that boy.

167: In spite of our battered mailbox, which lost to the snow plow, I saw even more grass around town today. It wasn't green, but still, it was grass.

168: I wouldn't trade my job with anybody in the entire world. Not even the iPad packagers at Apple.

169: My dog loves me every single day when I come home. And only after I've petted her and talked to her will she ask to go outside.

170: While my cat could not care less if I'm here or not, he seems to be a blessed beast.