The neighbors had a Halloween party tonight. Now, we're not big on trick or treat. We haven't dug this holiday (no pun intended, really) since we were kids. When Eaglescout and I were first married, we would hide in the back of the house on Halloween just to avoid the cretins who rang our doorbell. Then we realized we could actually go out to Barnes and Noble and avoid them altogether. Life was good.
     Then we had kids. Now our own cretins spend all summer long planning their costumes. Of course they change their minds as often as I wash my hands, so we don't even consider making a permanent decision till Oct. 24. This year we set our minds to making our own costumes instead of paying outrageous prices at Target for Chinese-made frocks of icky fabric and questionable authenticity. Hmph. Take that.

     I sat with my Singer and stitched and cut and stitched some more until I had reasonable facsimiles of Yoda's underpants and cape and Anakin's cape when he turned Dark and bad and all that jazz. These weren't perfect, and I'm certain they weren't flame retardant, but they were good enough for the boys. They were reasonable facsimiles. The cretins wore them around the house for a bit before letting me hang them up on hangers to wait for Halloween. 

     And so Halloween came and Eaglescout, being the good dad that he is, took the kids around the circle for trick or treat. I tried to convince Benjy that he should say, "Hmmmm, treat or trick. Hmmmmmmm" in his sweet, gravely Yoda voice. I think he couldn't see past all the sugar.

     

     After visiting those families who bothered to stay home and greet the throngs of treat-or-trickers tonight, we moseyed across the street for the neighborhood party. It was a pirate themed shindig, and most everybody was dressed up as some form of a pirate or bar wench or eye-patched pretender. We, on the other hand, were not. Oh, don't get me wrong. We did dress up. Eaglescout actually pulled this one out of his hat, giving in to the right side of his brain, which isn't easy when one's brain is composed 99.999% of the left side. Eaglescout spent a good portion of this afternoon with a hot glue gun and plastic gems and coins constructing a treasure chest. Then I came home and asked for my glue gun back and stuck coins to a black scarf I had buried in my dresser. 

     Then we donned our costumes. It was a bit exciting. Sort of like when I dressed up as a gypsy when I was 10 and wore a red taffeta prom dress I bought from Natisha LaForce at a yard sale for 50 cents. Only Mom wouldn't let me wear her red heels so it was a bit of a downer tromping around in my Pic-N-Pay tennies and this glam dress and make-up to boot. 

      I didn't even want to wear heels tonight. My foot was hurting, after all. It was more like throbbing. I put on my black clogs and wrapped my scarf around my neck. Eaglescout put on his box complete with a blinking heart pendant. And we were ready. 

      Announcing Treasure Chest and Booty.

All in all, for a Halloween that we just really don't care about, it was a good night. All the cheap Dollar Tree candy we put out was gone when we got home at a startling hour of 8:50. And the candy that the boys raked in will be traded for a toy by the Halloween Fairy tomorrow. The treasure chest split when Eaglescout sat down. My coined-bedecked scarf is trying to decide what to do with itself. And Yoda and Anakin are sound asleep, visions of SUGAR dancing in their dreams. 

And now, for something new. I found this site somehow this week and thought it would be an easy way to blog on Fridays. Every Friday they provide a new fill-in-the-blank thing. Here's today's.


1. My favorite food seasoning is salt.
2. Silence is music to my ears.
3. Lucky is finding money in my coat pockets.
4. Jimmy is something I take very seriously.
5. Many people think too much.
6. Meatballs was the last thing I bought at the store.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleeping. Tomorrow my plans include taekwondo and Sunday, I want to prop my foot up and rest!

Top Ten reasons to vote for Jimmy in this election.

10 - He doesn't have a blog. Or a facebook account. So he won't be wasting taxpayer dollars on his computer when he should be solving our financial crisis and establishing world peace.

9 - He's almost a black belt so he won't need as many secret service agents for protection. Don't fear the black belt. Fear the one who (will earn) it.

8 - He has skills. Girls like boys who have skills. I mean Americans deserve a president who has skills.

7 - He's big into debt control. He'd put Dave Ramsey in his cabinet. I hope he lets him out every now and again.

6 - He can see Russia from his back yard. On some nights. With a full moon and the short bus constellation in Jupiter's house.

5 - He does laundry. Will Obama or McCain do their own laundry? Has anybody ever even asked this very serious question? Do they even know how much it costs to run a load of whites? Do they know how much detergent to put into a high-efficiency washing machine? Can they even spell high-efficiency???

4 - He knows real plumbers. And he likes them. Power to the plumbers.

3 - He doesn't need $150,000 in new clothes. He's happy in his taekwondo pants and a Life is Good tee shirt. He does have a couple of suits for Very Important Meetings such as meetings with the White House Washer Women and Heads of States of Matter.

2 - He used to watch The West Wing. So he knows a thing or two about gov'ment. And politics. And stuff.

1 - He watches The Office. So he knows a thing or two about running a, well, an office.

Except Jimmy

I'm Jimmy's translator, and I approve this message.

Dear Princess,

Don't worry, I will be your friend. Even if you have never watched Charlie Brown's Great Pumpkin show. And for your viewing pleasure, and since you're stuck with nothing to do but watch movies on the computer since you can't eat and all. Here ya go. :)

Good luck tomorrow!

(At least you've seen Napoleon Dynomite.)

Edited to add: Princess, you have seen Rudolph, no??? 

I am so sick of campaign commercials. I think I really will write Jimmy in. At least he comes by his, well, uh, condition, honestly.

Meet Blue Doggie.

This is Benjy's favorite stuffed animal. He's been with him since the day the child was born. He's been called Blue Doggie since about then when Eaglescout and I were just too sleep-deprived to come up with a moniker of any originality. Blue Doggie is soft and cuddly and Just Right.

    

    Blue Doggie is Benjy's go-to dog. He's the one waiting for Benjy at bedtime, the one who makes the cut on long car trips, the one who watches movies with us at night and cartoons with us on weekends. Blue Doggie rocks in every way imaginable. One could say he's magical.

    And then Blue Doggie disappeared. It was early in the summer when we realized he was gone. We panicked. Maybe we'd left him in Maine! Maybe we accidentally sent him packing to the Goodwill. Maybe he was gone, gone, gone forever. No, Blue Doggie, we need you!!! All summer long we wondered where Blue Doggie could be. Nanna tore her house apart. Mammaw looked all over hers. We searched high and low here. No Blue Doggie. Benjy saw a picture of him and his precious Blue Doggie just last week and told me, "Well, at weast I have a picture of Blue Doggie to wemember him." My heart broke when he said that. This child is surely wiser than his years.

     Over the weekend Benjy and I were in his room sorting through his clothes. We had piles everywhere: clothes he had outgrown, clothes he would soon grow into, and clothes that were just right. Ah, Blue Doggie was Just Right once. Finally we got each pile put in its proper place and the room began to look tidy again. Except, the bed wasn't made. Flannel sheets, I thought. Benjy will be needing those soon. I reached up to the top shelf in his closet and pulled down the flannel set with the little doggies prancing across it. These would be perfect for the cooler days to come. As I let the sheets drop to the floor, I noticed something that didn't match. That was a problem. Sheets have to match. Pajamas have to match. Socks have to match. But this blue patch didn't match the cream tones of the sheets. Hmmmmm. What??? Could it be??? BLUE DOGGIE?!?!?!

    I don't know who was happier - Benjy, me, or Eaglescout. Camden was oh so polite, but not tickled pink by the return of Blue Doggie. "Oh, look, you found your Blue Dogie," he told his baby brother. "That's so nice." 

    Welcome home, Blue Doggie. We've missed you.

And now, a new Monday night feature:

Jimmy's World

Jimmy is busy doing homework tonight. 

He's working studiously on managerial economics. 

I caught him mumbling something about why businesses need to dwell on numbers so much. 

I told him to work for a nonprofit.

Ah, it's going to be a long, hard journey for Jimmy. 

But the Blue Doggie will get him through it.

Ah, back from Deep Creek, refreshed and caught up on sleep. Only to wake up today at 5:30 and start all over again. Sigh.

Dad's biopsy was yesterday, and it's sucky. His cancer is back, and the dr. is recommending surgery to remove his larynx. There. I said it. Seems like it's just easier to face it straight on, though in fact it's not easy no matter how you turn it. I cannot even imagine the mix of emotions he's feeling right now. I just pray that he will rely on God to give him strength, courage, and peace to endure what he has ahead. We NEED you, Dad. Please don't give up the fight.

Mom's the strongest woman I know. So brave, I think, for putting one foot in front of the other each and every morning after the horrible year they have been through. She was preparing for this moment a year ago, preparing for a stretch of taking care of Dad as he faced chemo and radiation for this cancer. And then they rejoiced when it was CURED. Thanks be to God. And then Michelle died. And they buried their baby daughter. And we moved in slow motion through that. We're still stumbling along. And now. This. I don't question God. His plan is perfect. His plan is best. I don't have a clue what it is. I'm in the dark here. But I just trust that it will all work out for his glory and our best. Not an easy task, but easy was no guarantee....

I love you, Mom. And you, too, Dad. I haven't stopped praying, and I won't.

On that note, I saw scripture on Kimba's blog in her Sunday Morning post. The timing was perfect. As usual.

Humble yourselves, therefore,

under God’s mighty hand,

that he may lift you up in due time.

Cast all your anxiety on him

because he cares for you.

(1 Peter 5:6-7)

Are you, my dear bloggy friends, looking for an easy post? Here's one that requires only ONE WORD for your answers. 

Where is your cell phone? van
Where is your significant other? home
Your hair color? brown
Your mother? Barbara
Your father? Terry
Your favorite thing? family
Your dream last night? dancing
Your dream/goal? heaven
The room you’re in? den
Your hobby? crafting
Your fear? terrorism
Where do you want to be in 6 years? home
Where were you last night? bed
What you’re not? taekwondo
One of your wish-list items? peace
Where you grew up? Virginia
The last thing you did? email
What are you wearing? pajamas
Your TV? CNN
Your pet? Emmalemmalimabean
Your computer? Apple
Your mood? somber
Missing someone? parents
Your car? Windstar
Something you’re not wearing but that you love to wear? slippers
Favorite store? Goodwill
Your summer? free
Love someone? yes
Your favorite color? yellow
When is the last time you laughed? today
Last time you cried? today

I leave this blog for a single fortnight and my peeps make an all-out debauchery of my brand spanking new vacuum cleaner. Oh, the double ententres! Oh yes, my good man, I know a double entendre when I see one. I read Shakespeare in college. And the Cliff Notes, too. 

Well, if you think you are so clever as to completely usurp my blog, then figure this out. I leave the rest of my writing to you in quotes from the bard himself. (Never have I felt so absolutely smart as when I speak in my Bard Voice.) See if you can name this play.

Me: "Do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe?"

You: "In my mind's eye"

Me: "That it should come to this!"

You: "The lady doth protest too much, methinks" 

Me: (Oh, you thinks, huh?) Well... "This above all: to thine own self be true."

You: "Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend, and borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry"

Me: Oh, stop with the economy already. You sound like you watched the debates last night. "The play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king"

You: "I will speak daggers to her, but use none"

Me: HELLO, I'm right HERE. You can speak to me in the first person!

You: "What a piece of work is man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals! "

Me: Methinks one thinks too highly of one's self. Whatever. "Brevity is the soul of wit"

My Dear Blog Peeps,

You're gonna love this one. Talk about an easy post!

My Nine Names -

1. Your real name:
Wendi Leighann Gibson Richert

2.Your gangsta name (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle):
Wenizzle

3. Your detective name (favorite color & favorite animal):
Yellow Elephant

4. Your soap opera name (your middle name & the street you live on OR
your neighborhood name if your street name is a number):
Leighann Castlegate

5. Your star wars name (the first 3 letters of your last name & first two
letters of your first name):
Ricwe

6.Your superhero or criminal name (your 2nd favorite color & favorite
drink):
Periwinkle Coffee

7. Your Iraqi name (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your
last name, 1st letter of your last name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden
name, 3rd letter of your dads name, 1st letter of a siblings first name &
last letter of your mom's first name):
Ecrtrma

8.Your witness protection name (parents' middle names):
Ann Lynn

9. Your goth name (black & the name of one of your pets):

Black Emma

And now, because you were just dying to know. My school lost the soccer game to Champion Christian today, 1-4. It was a bummer, but it wasn't a blow-out. Camden is Number 7. Actually, there are two number 7s. And there are two of a lot of numbers. But that's just a printing mistake. The names are there, too. So you can easily find your little person by looking for their special number AND then checking their name on the back. Clever, no? We certainly know how to tackle a problem. Vote for us in November.

And, finally, Consuela?

Meet Carmen Electra. 

She's fresh out of the box. 

Eaglescout had a minor tantrum this morning when he tried to vacuum with Dirt Devil. NowDirt Devil is a sad step brother to Carmen Electra's winning style. Eaglescout says that Carmen is lighter on her feet and doesn't talk as much. Two qualities he likes in a vacuum, I might add. 

What in the world will I blog about tonight.

Hmmmmmm................

He's home!!!!!

The Eagle has landed, again!

Eaglescout surprised us all at school today, appearing in my classroom, making some cute (or was it snide???) comment as I was tidying up before the kids left. He had quite a profound effect on them. They were silent. SILENT. No humming. No singing. Nothing. Zip. Nada. Silent! I think I'll hire him to come back! 

I flung my arms around his neck and just hugged him. And he hugged me back like he was afraid to let go. I missed the Eaglescout. :)

When Camden saw his dad in my room, after his class blurted out, "Camden, YOUR DAD'S IN YOUR MOM'S ROOOOOOOOOOM!", he did a U turn into my classroom, zoomed and jumped into his dad's arms, and cried. Boohooed the happiest sobs I've ever heard. Man, but that boy missed his dad. Benjy's reaction was a similar. As similar as a gentle shower is to a horrendous hurricane. Benjy just snuggled into his daddy's embrace and sat on his lap, refusing to get off for even a second until it was time to leave. The boys truly love their pop. Yep, Papa Bear is home. And Mama Bear is happier than a june bug. :)